Kidulthood

1. My dormitory has a curfew of 11pm. Every time I go out I have to rush to get home by the prescribed time, or else the dorm mother and father will worry. Actually, in the guide book it said they'd phone our parents. But I don't believe it somehow. As in, I just don't think they'd make a long distance phone call to speak to my mother, who doesn't speak a word of Japanese (the dorm mother and father function exclusively in Japanese). Anyway, the rules are there. I’m a prisoner after 11pm. The only way round it is to submit a form explaining where i’ll be (holiday, friends house etc. I don’t think there was a box for nightclub). I can do this. I’m gona do this, it makes sense. It’s just a rather peculiar sensation, having a curfew. Having to tell people where you are. Having to plan things.

2. Also, my Japanese lessons are pretty much identical to primary school, when I was learning to read and write in English. It’s the same stuff but a different language. My reading was excellent when I was 5. My writing was not so good; actually it was terrible. I remember learning to write. All the letters had to look the same on the sheet. I wanted to write imaginative stories but my spelling too bad so I could only manage a string of consonants and random vowels. Today, it’s exactly the same but in a different language. My spelling is terrible but I want to know how to write this and that. It’s frustrating.

These two things, juxtaposed, are having a strange effect. I feel like a little girl learning to do things and living by certain rules, but also having to pay rent and look after myself. Its really weird.